``````````````````So I don't normally broadcast this sort of stuff, but with how disrespectful and uncalled for it was, I do have a response.```````````````````````
"To the one against the world,
Because you blocked me, I have no other way of contacting you. Maybe you will read this, maybe you won't.
Your insulting and patronizing was childish, and frankly, I shouldn't respond, but apparently you have a grudge you are holding onto for unfathomable reason. I never insulted you, nor attacked you. I never treated you poorly, and I NEVER judged you for anything. You were the one who unfriended me on facebook first, then declared that I was ignoring you and demanding to know if I disliked you. Don't ask me if I dislike you, then not tell me why you think I dislike you in the first place. If I've done something to make you feel that way and you are inclined to ask, tell me what makes you feel that way and I'll do whatever I can to improve myself and be better so you don't get that impression anymore. I do not dislike people. I instinctively care about all people, even those who have done me wrong. It takes a hefty dose of something distasteful for me to dislike a person. I do my best to be a pleasant and friendly person, if shy sometimes. I'm terrible at the whole social thing. It takes me a long time of observing and studying behaviors that come naturally to some people for me to put them out myself. Thus, sometimes, I know I might not always be putting off the right vibes or whatever throughout times I am spending with others, and if someone brings that up, I get an anxiety to learn what I was doing wrong so I can fix it, work on improving those habits, and not make them feel bad anymore. However, I know for a fact I was did nothing to indicate any dislike for you.
Then you message me and expect me to to remember that your birthday was a couple days before, tried to guilt trip me about it, and proceed to invite yourself, at my expense, to me treating you to dinner to make up for not remembering your birthday. Trying to play if off as a joke when I catch you in your words. I'd been friendly, I'd been nice, but it was driving me up the wall. I didn't owe you anything. Whether it was your birthday or not. I didn't deserve to be guilted for not remembering it, when I rely heavily on calendars automatically set up by site such as Facebook for remembering people's birthdays (not that I don't care, I'm just terrible at remembering), which is something you intentionally disconnected me from your account as a friend, therefore I had no way on knowing it was your birthday except for the fact that like maybe 5 years ago I wished you a happy birthday. I didn't have to make up for not knowing your birthday, and I had no reason to fork out my minimal savings on an implied dinner date because you enjoyed toying around and don't know how to take no as an answer. Sir, that was without a doubt and
overall unpleasant to deal with. The culmination
ill mannered mind games was not welcome.
You acted like everyone in the state you live in is a terrible judgemental person just because they don't agree with everything you say or they aren't interested in the same things you are. Which in turn is specifically taking a jab at me, as well as my religion by saying everyone in that religion is sheep minded or lives in a bubble. You demanded answers from people and expect them to be an open book to you, but not vice versa. And then things start getting weird. You sent me letters under false names (as a joke you claim), and yes for one I believe that. But then some qualities of our conversations took on an unsettling quality. You seemed to be implying things, but would never outright say them. Like trying to get me to go to a convention with you, yet you would avoid any outright invitation and when I questioned if you were trying to invite me, you tried to make me be the one who instigated anything. You wouldn't own up to any of your actions, intentions, or simple conversation. That to me was a red flag. Further demands for me to attend events that neither of us was connected to, left me wondering what you were thinking, but you adamantly avoided every question I asked out of genuine curiosity and concern. The evasive reactions seemed worrisome to me, and I tried asking you about it, but was never answered.
For all that time, I had considered us friends. You didn't. You treated me poorly, deleted me from contact except for on your terms. I asked to understand, but you wouldn't reciprocate. You hid, and what it was you were hiding, not knowing, grew that uneasiness. My boyfriend saw my concern, and understood. He tried to contact you because he knew I cared about you as a friend, but his protectiveness of me was met by utter hostility by you; though he genuinely wanted to help improve yours and my interactions so that the small friendship we had wouldn't be lost. It seemed, you never actually cared about being friends. You refused to listen at all because you thought he was attacking you and you took offense. All our interactions felt like they were adding up to a bait/phishing scheme, but for what reason I don't understand. I never had any ill will toward you, but in the end, it seems you hold a grudge that makes you feel it is okay to lash out at me.
You even acted like I hadn't pointed out my concern to you personally when you sent me this message:
"Next time problem with someone, have the nerve to tell them yourself. Don't send your boyfriend to do it for you."
I did for the last few weeks of our conversations.. I wanted to clarify what was between us so that there was no concern, so that it wasn't hidden, but you constantly shut me down. The kind of trust it took for me to confide in my boyfriend that I was concerned was exactly the kind of trust you were twisting and neglecting, creating the concern in the first place. No friendship can be built on evasive conversation. My boyfriend cared about me enough to be there for me and to seek a solution. That is not a lack of nerve. Your actions were a lack of nerve. You couldn't trust someone who actually cared about you, your well being and your success. The things you cared about. The things a real friend cares about.
The last message I was able to send to you before you completely blocked me from every account you have, was hurt, and in defense of myself. I asked you to leave me be, but, just out of a last stitch of spite, you curse me out and then close all your accounts. How cruel can a person be? Taking someone who truly wanted to encourage you in your endeavors, never backbiting, or selling you out, and treating them like absolute crap just for wanting to improve their understanding of you is unimaginatively cruel and self-centered; Yet I know it's out of fear and pain...
And I feel so, so sorry for you, I would never wish that kind of loneliness on anyone. I would never treat someone, especially one whom I knew was suffering, poorly. So, Skyler, I wish for you the best. Now that you have completely cut me off, this is the only way I can send you this response. I can bet it won't be taken well because is is blunt and honest, but I mean it when I say that I hope you find peace in your heart, and trust in others who mean you well. I am not your enemy. I don't hate you. I never had an issue with you, just a concern of trust. I don't blame you for the things you said to hurt me, and I would ask that for those in your future that you be more considerate of them, and not try to intentionally make them hurt or feel bad. Please be well and take care of yourself.
To my watchers, sorry about this being a public post. The person in question deleted their DA, blocked me on FB, as well as FA, and likely any other means of communication. I doubt he'll even see this, but I wanted it to be said. If he ever somehow catches wind of this it would be appreciable, but I don't expect that to ever happen.
Anyways good night all!